Deathly Hallows Review and Impressions!

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Well... time to review the release of Deathly Hallows... Better get this over with.

So, after the last book where they relased things bit by bit, building it up, making us work a little for the content, what do we get? Pretty much a step back. Pottermore handled this with all the taste and hype of a dog taking a dump. Just squatted down, pinched it out, gave a few kicks and went on their way.

Now as always, artwork was fantastic, but given they had the same rule of three maximum, it's kind of difficult to find much redeeming, especially when the last four moments were pretty much uneventful, and seemed like more of a chore than anything of interest. It only got worse here. 28 points total to collect and all within those first ten moments. The Canape was the only one that seemed difficult in my opinion, and for those collecting beans or chocolate frog cards, there were absolutely none.

I mean, I find myself struggling to find something POSITIVE TO say here, as the moments, especially the final four, were so anticlimatic, that I half think Pottermore's order to the studio was simply "here's an envelope, give us the best you can... and eh...don't make it too fancy now." Even the Basilisk moment from the Second book was far better, more cinematic and actually managed to give you a fright or some sense of... purpose. And Dumbledore's funeral in the last book managed to convey some of that solemness (save stealing things from guests and smacking Fudge's hat to make him tell us stuff about Merlin).  Though let me give an example of how bad the last four moments were, by highlighting the worst of them.

This is the death of Snape. I moved my mouse once and got a full gold bar. This was how Snape died. One of the main characters. This is what they opted to show. Not him handing a memory of him and Lily to Harry. Not him falling to the floor after. No, it was just a bit of a wobbly bubble movement while Nagini is nomming on his tasty neck.

I know this is how he dies, more or less, in the books. But if you are going to show a death... give it some style like with Dumbledore, or Sirius. Show the struggle a little. Allow a zoom skipping to him handing a memory to Harry. The way this looks, it's like Voldemort thought "Oh shoot... I need to feed Nagini... oh Hi Snape, would you just stand here DIE DIE DIE  hm... beautiful chilly weather we have out.... I wonder what Potter is doing."

So I'm sure someone, one of you may be asking... What about Rowling's content, we got that at least right?  Well right you are loyal reader! But it feels like they are really scraping the barrel. The bit on Petunia was decent, as was the bit on Alchemy, more or less confirming an old fan theory on the name signifigance between Albus and Rubeus. And after that, there was pretty much some minor content on hatstalls, trying to justify Peter Pettigrew being in Gryffindor over Slytherin. But all in all it's JUST not that impressive. Out of 14 moments, we got 4 with read about things, and THREE were continuations of previous ones, and the one NEW one was well, just that fan confirmation. Which is cool, and great if Rowling churned those out just for this release, but working under the assumption she has a LOT of this stuff stored up, and probably has given Pottermore some license to put it out, it comes off as terribly, almost irredemably lazy. (Seriously, NOTHING on Horcruxes or the Hallows? )

But the good news, the BEST news out of this is that Pottermore isn't done. Not yet, though an important warning is needed. To Pottermore's employees, if any of you read this lovely blog, I want to say thank you, but you know you can do better. This was an embarasment and handled with such little ceremony and pomp that I can make comparisons to dogs taking a dump and it works. You are Pottermore. This was the last of the Harry Potter books. The last of the original seven. This was a book that had midnight releases, parties, and fans hyped the whole world over. This is when we stepped away from Harry's story to find our own. And you squeezed it out like a turd, and gave it what minimal standards you could to try and make it work. I get that it's difficult, and with people like me, that can see your releases ahead of time, it's hard to be surprised. But you've had this artwork ready for months, you only teased it once as shiney keys for the removal of comments.

And to Users... Remember Pottermore is what we make it. So despite Pottermore's shortcomings, so long as we keep a strong community, and friendships, Pottermore will never die, and that's perhaps the "true" Pottermore. The community and fandom, all brought together due to a boy in a cupboard under the stairs, that eventually became a master of death.